initiative can be intricate

Speaking with a lady-friend got me thinking about what would move things along in my single life (i.e., obtain boyfriend...check), and I've determined that she's right... initiative would help immensely. That and a natural ability to not make a guy who's acting interested feel like an ass. In my humble opinion, initiative is not so easily attained. In fact, for the deathly shy (like me) initiative is like climbing the Everest in a wheelchair. Probably not impossible, but it would take one brave s.o.b. to attempt it. How can I get brave in that area of my life? Because, really, what have I got to lose? (dignity comes to mind.) I can pick a fight with a man, get a tattoo, fly across the world by myself, eat bugs, teach bunch of spoilt teenagers, speak in front of hundreds of people, and I can't smile and make eyes at a boy? Hmmm. New addition to the "check" list...take some initiative with the boys ; )

cupid call & dating checklist

Today is February 14 – the busiest day for florist and restaurant owners around the world. I’ve never really had a valentine, but also, I’ve never really minded as I usually find the day to be so forced and cheesy. Of course this doesn’t mean I don’t yearn for romance, love and affection, I definitely do (about 23 hours of the day).

Even this year, I will be okay if I don’t have a “Valentine”, but won’t deny a little part of me wishes for a secret admirer or for some advancement with someone else.

You know how sometimes you don't realize how bizarre certain aspects of your life are until someone else points them out to you? Well, I've always known my dating life has been, um, how shall I put this? Ah yes - messy - but after reading the following email from a friend, I realize it's not so much messy as it is disastrous! Read on and have a good laugh (don't worry, it's not at my expense; I'm laughing too!).

You know a guy has potential if the answer to ALL of the following is "No":

did he eat your entire meal, plus his own, and then refuse to let you order dessert?

does he have illegitimate children?

does he sweat profusely and have no problems dousing you with his perspiration?

does he kiss you, then take a phone call from another girl and proceed to spend 45 minutes talking to her (in front of you)?

did his parents hit on you in a bookstore?

does he have stalking tendencies?did your friends nickname him "Crazy"?

Who here thinks I could star in my own reality show? - (I do, I do!)

Clearly, my life is for entertainment purposes only.

And we wonder why I'm still single

moths and butterflies

Love is measured in butterflies.

Lust is measured in... thoughts.


Don't ask me to explain.

addicted...

I have an addictive personality. I'm not even sure if that's an accurate psychological assessment, but in my mind, it accurately describes my tendency to latch on to things I like. For example, I am addicted to Coke. I have written poetry about my love affair with caffeine. For this site, it's probably more relevant to talk about my addiction to the idea of love. You see, before this...I haven't been in love in a long time. So, while not being in love, I've developed an addiction with the idea of love. Movies and TV (hell...even books) simply fuel addictions such as these. As "chick flicks" crowd your local cineplex, you can bet there are millions of girls like me watching and calculating when Richard Gere will ride up and save them from the virtual whoredom that is their lives (hello.... Pretty Woman). How can we break this fascination for wanting what isn't real and start searching and dealing with what is? Maybe this is just me, but all too often I find a small part of me wanting to be more in the movie than in my own life (think love/romance/men, not life in general).