watch ur step!!

We’re literally walking on the cusp of a new year…and I am excited. It’s been quite a year, in more ways than one. Like everyone else, I hit a few rough spots, had some really amazing moments…you know….I lived. And now, I am set to do it all over again. “OPTIMISTIC” all in all, I can’t really complain – it was a great year even with the rough spots (‘for it’s in the valleys that I grow’). I’m looking forward to taking everything that I’ve learned and applying it to my forward momentum.

Gonna hang out with some friends today. Hook up with mr nice-guy and his friends for what promises to be a very “interesting” weekend. I’ve been advised to pack a bag with a mix of things – lounging gear, casual gear, something “flashy” (as if I need anything more than my personality. Ha!) Now you know I had questions (still haven’t quite learned to just go with the flow). I mean really, where are we going? When are we leaving? When are we coming back? Um…we ARE coming back, right? The only hint forthcoming is we’ll probably be in either Genting or PD. *sigh* That’s still a big spread, right? For some reason, I’ve always thought New Year’s Eve was the most romantic time of the year. Don’t ask me why. *shrugs* Anyway, no matter what I do or where I end up, I’m sure it will be just what I need. So, while I’m bit nervous about how all of this will play out, I’m excited too. And that’s how I’m going into 2007 – EXCITED. Ready to receive all that universe has for me. To step boldly and fully into it with both feet. Waist deep. Let it soak into me until it to floods my very bone marrow. I am ready.

Be bold

Be beautiful

Be free

BE!

To those of you who bless me with your unique gift of friendship, I have no words that will convey just how much you mean to me. Thank you for listening, for counseling me, for laughing with me (or at me as the case may be), for pushing me, for prodding me, for letting me cry til I was over it (or could at least catch my breath), for the virtual slaps when I was losing my mind (merlina, tis one is for u). It’s all good. Truly.

Love & kisses from sri!

inner feelings! (unoriginal sin)

this is an intricate post, i can't elaborate the details. try not to ask questions! i’m going to burn in hell! I’ve commit something very serious… something i can't redeem myself from. the apple of unoriginal sin. the sin of "wanting what I can’t have" - i shall burn in hell for what i did... (full stop)

feelings...

I've been havin an incredible mixed feeling these day, I don’t know exactly when it started but I know that I need to sort out these feelings right away otherwise my heart and brain would never rest. Somehow I know that in order to sort these out, I need to write down feelings I felt… but since the mix is really heavy and vary I found my self blank, not knowing what to blurt out first.

Well, I know that I felt highly confuse about what’s the next step for my career, I also know that I felt desperate about taking my life to “the place” I always dreamt of and I know that I felt of missing someone badly and on the other hand know that it’s impossible to go on. I know that I felt irritated about knowing what my goals are but couldn’t find a way to achieve it yet. I know that I felt bothered with how I demand so much to my self without even care about my own limit. I know that I felt so much more than what I have said above but not able to put it into words…. Arrrggghhhh!!!!!!

Oh shoot…. It’s not working….. It’s not happening…. I can’t sort these feelings out, let alone discarded it…. What to do…. dank!!!

work sucks!

It’s 1 pm. I’m at work, and I don’t feel like being here, so I am blogging to waste time.
Work today sucks, not that every day doesnt, but this one seems to suck even more than usual because I had one of those lovely little status meetings with my so called gay-boss about how the work is doing, blah, blah, blah...basically what it is that I am doing wrong and what kind of crap my asshole co-workers have been saying about me.

Work is work. I'm in a position now I don't really love. I am getting discouraged. Very discouraged. Office politics. Office rumors. I heard the person who got the job applied after the deadline. All sorts of stuff like that. Makes me wonder if they see me fitting into this organization.

Fuck it all. I hate these people, I hate this office, I just needed to vent...

sirilah raman

feel good... part 2

That was posted this morning. Now it’s close to 5 PM and I don’t want to hug no tree! I want to chop it down and use it on people in my office especially d one tat I dumped and the person who gave birth to him!

feel good...

This is making me feel good today:

• Snowy & Duchess (my dogs) telling me this morning that they love me (unconditional love).
• I manage to fit into my sexy skirt with front-cut (bit tight though).
• Smelling baby Savaiz’s breath. It has that sweet baby smell.
• All of us watching Thomas the tank engine videos on the main living room.
• Coffee. I so do love my coffee. The entire week I couldn’t find any good coffee and it was the first thing I did when I got up this morning - made myself a good cup of coffee.
• Good music. Totally hooked with John’s Mayers “Waiting on the world to change”.
• Health. The fact that we are all healthy.
• Skype wit Merlina

Go hug your boyfriend, husband, child, dog, cat, a tree…. just go out and spread some love people! The sun is shining (or it might be cold and snowing at some part of d world) but we are experiencing it. For that I am thankful. Being able to experience - good or bad - it is making me feel good today.